This weekend, my honey and I are taking a trip to visit his brother’s family and their new born. It’s a joyous occasion and while I love babies, enjoy road trips, and the family is nice, I’m apprehensive.
Is that bad?
Maybe it is, but that’s how I feel.
Why?
It’s awkward visiting my boyfriend’s brother. The nervousness, the over thinking, the feelings of being judged, it’s energy draining. I’m worried I won’t be accepted.
That’s crazy!
I’ve connected with them plenty of times!
Ok, maybe it’s all in my head.
Although.
They gossip.
They tell everyone’s business and it’s nerve wrecking.
Yes, I’m carrying on like an 8 year old right now.
My arms are folded and I’m pouting (well maybe not physically, but the little girl in my mind is).
It’s a day before the trip and I have to spew whatever venom I have inside so I can turn this stinkin’ thinkin’ around. Since backing out isn’t what I want, finding the good in this situation will get me out of this funk.
So what do I want?
I want to be at peace driving through rolling farm lands and quaint towns. I want to laugh, delight in the simple things, and be carefree.
I want confidence to be myself and connect with others, especially my boyfriend’s family.
Relationships make life worth living and we all want to be loved for who we are.
Moments of acceptance creates unforgettable memories.
Most of all, I want to fill up my emotional bank account with unforgettable memories.
Much like a retirement plan, the longer you wait to start saving, the more time works against you.
I have a dear friend who’s emotional bank account is filled with great memories.
He enjoys sharing his favorite vacation experiences.
The other day, my friend shared the story of when he and his family took a 3 week trip to D.C.
While my friend reminisced about the trip, I could hear the love in his voice. I visualized his family trekking around D.C. sight seeing.
“We had a plan A, plan B, and screw the plan!” My friend proudly stated with laughter.
It wasn’t the first time he shared this story with me. He knew it and I knew it but neither of us cared.
My friend took me with him on vacation every time he shared that story.
And I appreciate it.
Every time my friend shares his stories, I’m reminded of what a fulfilled life is all about.
A great life is filled with experiences and I have an opportunity to create amazing memories this weekend.
The trip we’re taking tomorrow can be special and exciting if I choose.
Know this, I acknowledge my hesitations and with confidence, envision a fun weekend.
Now it’s time to pack.
Have a great weekend!
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